Am I ruining my children?
Currently a missionary to Poland, Doyle Fletcher, spoke in our church. Doyle is a member of our church and candidly admitted asking God something that I remember asking just a few short decades ago:
“Am I ruining my kids?”
Choosing to be a missionary to Poland, Doyle has given up not just baseball games for himself, but for his two boys as well. Polish boys don’t play baseball. WOW! Deja Vu. When we left our hometown, moved to Houston, and started home schooling I was plagued with WHAT AM I GIVING UP THAT WILL RUIN MY KIDS?
What do you worry about having given up for yourself that will DAMAGE your kids?
My damage list included no-student-government and no-cheerleading (yes, I am shallow!).
When I started home schooling our daughter I remember a friend asking me,
“Don’t you want her to be a cheerleader?”
The truth was,
“No. I wasn’t a cheerleader. She can live without that.”
But that one little question did prompt a thousand other worries in my head…Will she have any friends? What about all that strength I gained from sharing my faith on a secular campus? How will she ever be in a club? What if she never goes to a birthday party?
There are SO many things I worried about my kids losing–doing without.
The truth is–they DID do without a lot of things other kids received. Not one of my kids had the “sex talk” given to them by a school nurse like Ted and I did. Not one of my kids has EVER had a food fight in a cafeteria…home is another matter. Keeping my children from participating in EVERY available activity known to man may be ruining them in the eyes of some. It might be protecting them or sheltering them in the eyes of others. Sometimes people condemn you for THAT as well.
Through the years, a few friends have told me that my kids were sheltered.
Thank you. I hope so.
The world is a huge cruel place–but the truth is that it is NOT huge and cruel to me every day. Why? Because I was sheltered from it. I believe in people. I see the good in people. Truth is: I don’t even know how bad the world is: I have been sheltered. I talk to strangers. I pray with them in Wal-Mart and Kroger. Sometimes I am cynical but more often when I watch a movie or TV show that depicts “real” life I am thankful ALL over again for the things my kids missed. Sheltered, protected, isolated, ruined. BRING IT ON.
Are you ruining your children? Good girl. Give yourself a pat on the back. What have you become aware of that you missed out on or that your children are “missing” because of your protective care?